Subville

Oh no. The tennis on BBC2 is gonna run longer, what shall we do?

Keep it running and delay Mary Queen of Shops?

OR

Switch the whole thing to BBC1 and delay the first episode of the programme we've spent loads on and will be running all week at the same time ...

(Criminal Justice)

Decisions, decisions

Bluddy idiots.

My initials are L.E.N.S.

He wants a different one now

Y'know how I'm always yacking on about the price of food at the Co-op?

They saved my bacon (lol) this week. In a scary way I guess. It seems I've spent over £2000 there this year. Twice per year they give out vouchers for how many loyalty points you got.

This week - £45 !!!

In the nick of time *phew*

Sick of biting my tongue ...

I thank GOD for that. Perfect timing as usual

get a headache from eating chocolate? I googled it and it seems quite common.

I used to get palpitations when I ate it, and panic attacks.

In saying that ... I did just eat a whole packet of Bahlsen biscuits

mibbe I should be a tad more restrained

***

Fell asleep with wet hair after my bath - curliness

***

Discovered I love Elbow, not in the way that Brick Tamland loves lamp.

Must go rummaging in youtube ....

25. Last time you travelled by bus?

Wednesday I think

26. What do you never leave the house without?

Keys, mobile, money

Nicked from my gorgeous boyfriend

60 Things You Possibly Didn’t Know About Me [But Now You Do]

1. What is in the back seat of your car right now?

If I could drive, if I had a car ... coats and bags and stuff scattered all over the place

2. When was the last time you threw up?

When I was drunk years and years ago.

3. What's your favourite curse word?

Fuck.

4. Name 3 people who made you smile today?

Andy
Jonathan Ross
Andy (JR's sidekick)

5. What were you doing at 8 am this morning?

Sleeping (ish)

6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?

Talking to someone on the phone.

7. Have you ever been to a strip club?

Yes! only kidding, naah, but I would outta interest

8. What is the last thing you said aloud?

"See you later"

9. When is your birthday?

22nd July

10. What is the best ice cream flavour?

Vanilla, or good quality chocolate.

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?

Earl Grey tea (ooh big surprise!)

12. What are you wearing right now?

Minnie Mouse nightie

13. What is the last thing you ate?

Hot buttered toast

14. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?

Yes ... long stripy socks

15. When was the last time you ran?

Can't remember. I don't 'do' running.

16. What's the last sporting event you watched?

... unregistered

17. What's the last sport you played?

Swingball

18. Who is the last person you sent a comment/message on myspace?

Ages ago a guy commented to me, not realising that I know him from church and he'd just split up with a friend of mine ... he was browsing for 'friends' I believe I hate that site. I only joined cos Andy had one and I've since deleted.

19. Ever go camping?

Have done. It's a laugh (when there are cooshy utilities nearby)

20.Do you have a tan?

A little bit. My chest is sun-damaged from being in Gran Canaria a few years ago. I thought I was covered enough

21.Have you ever lost anything down a toilet?

A toothbrush. It wasn't mine

22.What is your guilty pleasure?

My free weekends.

23.Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?

Too much prolly. But I'll keep doing it

24. Do you drink your soda from a straw?

Only if it's from a carton.

27. What are you doing tomorrow?

Much the same as today ... not a lot.

28. Where is your mum right now?

I shall avoid the deep, theoretical answer and just say ... she's dead.

29. Look to your left, what do you see?

Handbag, Radio Times, remote for freeview, house phone

30. What colour is your watch?

I don't wear one, I'm allergic to nickel and it's too much hassle trying to find one that doesn't cause a rash and bleeding.

31. What do you think of when you think of Australia?
Same as Andy ... a pair of ex-bloggers.

32. Ever ridden on a roller coaster?

Yes, terrifying.

33. What is your birthstone?

Ruby? Moonstone? One of those two.

34. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

See question 1. But I would drive through if I could.

35. What is your favourite number?

7

36. Do you have a dog?

No. I'm too lazy.

37. Last person you talked to on the phone?

Andy

38. Have you met anyone famous?

What? Apart from Juzzzy?

39. Any plans today?

Chatting to my lovely man, wishing the days away.

40. How many provinces countries have you lived in?

Two.

41. Ever go to college?

Yes, I did a catering course, a horticultural one and studied horse management for a while.

42. Where are you right now?

On the couch.

43. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?

Logistics.

44. Last song listened to?

Hello by Sugarbomb

46. Are you allergic to anything?

Penicillin, nickel and oranges.

47. Favourite pair of shoes you wear all the time?

Teh black ones I got from Rocket Dog.

48. Taste in your mouth right now?

Morning breath

49. Are you jealous of anyone?

No. I like being me, I've gotten used to the pros and cons.

50. Is anyone jealous of you?

I don't know.

51. Do you love anyone?

Yes.

52. Do any of your friends have children?

Yes.

53. Do you eat healthy?

Sometimes

54. What do you usually do during the day?

Tussle with self-loathing, blog, try to make life better.

55. Do you hate anyone right now?

No. I've tried but I can't.

58. Do you own any big sunglasses?

No.

59. Have you ever been to Six Flags?

No, and I don't know what that is!

60. How did you get one of your scars?

By squeezing a cracked cup to see if I could make it break. I could.

Sleeping was tricky last night.

My electric toothbrush was charging and therefore flashing a blue light in the corner of the room. I put a pile of books and a Happy Mother's Day card in front of it ... still felt like there was a tiny emergency going on over there, involving the Borrowers.

In the next house I could hear what can only be described as thwapping.

I don't know how many were involved but it was awfully fast so I suspect one.

Dragged my humungus quilt, bouncy pillow and wee pink heart-shaped cushion through to the wee yin's room. Plonked myself on the floor and tried to sleep. It took about an hour.

Almost considered the climb up onto the loft bed. But the ladder is so narrow it shaves skin off my hips when I come back down

I may simmer in the bath for hours today

Not skint ingly

I right enjoyed that last wee bit of the Nelson Mandela thingy.

Watching them all ... is that the happiest song ever? Knowing what happened and how it all turned out? Thinking of the Mugabe shambles too and what can be achieved when folk decide enough is enough.

*Citizen Smifff*

Mmmmm the smell of sandal feet

Into town today. Made eye appointments for me and Mini. Lunched at Tatties, coffee'd at Starbucks (well, chai latte'd).

Baring my legs. Lower half only. That's my kindness shining out

Discovered that Fit Flops make my right ankle very sore. No support, y'see.

It's all very well walking 'heel to toe' (kinda rolling the whole foot) but dodgy ankle no' like

*annoyed*

Found the Pound Shop. It makes up for that branch of Heffers being shut down

Gardening gloves, long stripy socks and an Alexei Sayle book - woohoo!

Got that thing for Mini's birthday. Glad I've done that - can tick that off the list *phew*

P bought a DS Lite for herself when she's ill and has to stay in bed.

Mini's away to Dad's early this weekend (tonight), ex has to move niece's furniture from B'rum to here so taking the wee yin with him. He'll be pleased more of his cousins are moving here. Nearly half the family here now. Or 'clan' as he calls them. There are LOTS of them.

I can cope with them now that they don't have to do the 'proving he's closer to us' thing with my ex. Why do families do that? Constant testing of boundaries and loyalties. *weird*

*tug of war*

"Help me with this ... help me with that ... what family time?"

Probably all different relationships involve that a little bit. Deeply irritating and irrational but you have to let them go through whatever it is till they stop. Never fight against it. That was my mistake

Anyway, it's been threatening to rain all day so is very dark. I've found that it's affecting my vision quite a lot ... which is worrying. I haven't felt such a struggle before to see properly *gulp*

Roll on Tuesday ..

... from The Phelps.

*google them*

Their beliefs are not mine.

Hate mongers ain't welcome.

*shudder*

Sinus block. Fuck.

Eyes like balls.

May have scared the WFI bloke. That's what I get for not looking in the mirror till evening, caught off guard.

Sunny day. Shades

Work Focussed Interview. It went quite well actually.

Got some helpful contacts for when I'm looking for work (after the summer holidays)

He also told me that if you've been receiving benefits for 12 months, then you sign off with even just 16 hours work per week, they give you £40 per week for a year to help you with the transition. A lump sum (which I knew about) to start off with plus the £40 per week to get you back on yer feet! It's not taxed or touched by any other deductions.

Strangely helpful really.

There's bound to be a catch - I'm so naive

He was gutted that my old work are losing their contract too. Progress, eh? The local government were only trying the Skills Coaching as a pilot scheme apparently. Another one of those 'schemes' to put pressure on, except that one didn't. It was more encouraging than anything else.

This new incentive is designed to get you off their books (for at least a year) as soon as possible. Still, I'm not complaining. For me it will be the right thing. Financial confidence while gaining experience and office confidence.

We'll see.

We should do Leeds again.

It would need someone who's good at bartering for deals though. Nixie did it before and got us a deal at a hotel, with reduced rates cos we booked a couple of months in advance.

It was easy and fun cos we had time to chat with each other and it was in a hotel instead of a mega noisy pub.

Want.

Who has been here the longest?

Tell me!

It's Spot The Founder Member Day tomorrow ... I've just decided

Purple Dragon has been here awhile.

RIThompson (Ros) just told me she's passed the three year mark a coupla weeks ago.

I saw someone earlier from April 2005 (JT Something?)

I gave up my founderness (?) when I ditched my blog, so my pseudo-blogaversary is 12th July (3 years)

TELL ME!!!!

10loves10
KenDrive
Juzzzy
Saffronica
MarkJT
Eggbod

P.S. Since I can't be a founder member cossa the blog burning and all I shall be known as a Flounder Member

Why's it so quiet in here?

Yay! Phoned the DSS and they were helpful!!!

The one I spoke to last week was totally disinterested but the one I spoke to today realised I wasn't trying to con them outta money

She says there's obviously been a mistake with the calculations and will put a request in, to have it re-assessed *phew*

P.S. must remember to buy black pen for job application

Before I start ... I realise Andy might answer this so I didn't have to blog it!

I like attention though, so ... *bloo-loo-loo-loo-looooooooo*

I have an external TV card. It's WIN TV. It's been plugged into my desktop for ages. I get freeview channels on it as well as terrestrial ones. Since my PC caked-it, I've been trying to install it on my lappie. The lappie is Vista run. Are you seeing the problem? Nothing works with feckin Vista. There are many and varied downloads on the Hauppauge website HERE but I don't know which one to use *sob*

Can anyone help???

WIN TV NOVA T USB2

Friday

Got to CAB and managed to see lawyer for a little while. Took paperwork to the courts. Bus home.

Package through the door when I got back. My Dad sent his old mobile for the wee yin to use. It still has just under £20 on it. Phoned ex to let him know and he came round half hour later to collect it.

P arrived and we set off. Roads fairly clear, minor traffic blocks but nothing annoying. Went to Ikea first for meatballs and a stroll round eyeing up goodies. caught myself 're-assessing' what I can afford (nothing ... hmmm, maybe a new rug?) Spent nothing except at the foodie bit at the end. Ginger bikkits and Elderberry drink. Oh yeah, and the usual - packets of cream sauce for meatballs.

To hotel. Lovely. Went for a swim, steam room and sauna. Never done that before Unbearably hot ... no more than 3 minutes in steam, 10 in sauna.

Harvester for dinner, got muddled with road diversions but managed in the end. Tasty, don't drink the home-made lime juice. It could strip yer teeth.

Had a relaxing evening, watched Ocean's 13 (I hadn't seen it yet). The i-net access wasn't free but at least I had the lappie to watch dvds.

Saturday

Delicious brekkie in quiet dining room. Lots of fruit and my staple - hot buttered toast. Went to MK Centre. Massive. Was very well-behaved ( = didn't spend!) Knackered when we got back. Swam, steamed and sauna'd. Managed a bit longer today. Watched recycled film (Guess Who = Meet The Parents + race issue???)

Lovely sleep again.

Sunday

Woke at 9ish. Pootled around, brekkie, signed out.

You should do it, y'know. Save Tesco vouchers and go to The Hilton

Much enjoyed

... excitingness tomorrow Nearly forgot it's tomorrow I'm going.

Shaved my legs (no, Andy won't be there I'm going swimming one night)

It's a twin room so I told P to bring earplugs. Ahem.

I can't help it.

There's wireless connection so my lappie (Skype) will be there with me

Wha? We breathe in harmony I'd miss him too much

---

Met Jack yesterday. Me, in the queue buying blister plasters cos I'd limped to Sainsburys, him at the coffee thingy - spotting me and signalling "Do you want coffee?" I point to myself "Do you mean me?" lol

He's bluddy lovely I know Kelly met him too so she already knows this. Had a brilliant chat and I coulda stayed for hours yapping with him. I hope we do coffee again. Genuine top bloke Our kids go to the same school and are in the same year He knew a short cut to drop me home too

Thanks, Jack, yer a star xx

I can't remember what my old blog name was!

Weird.

edit ... I mean my sign in name

Don't do it.

You'll miss all the add-ons that aren't supported yet. I've gone back to the previous version.

xxx

Ok so I guess there's been a lot going on in my dome recently, what with a child I know getting hurt, family stuff, Mini trouble stuff, etc.

Gonna try to get my head together a bit so I don't stay in 'that' place.

* Apply to 2 places for jobs
* Sort out (even more) paperwork for lawyer
* Learn to cook better so Mini doesn't eat processed food (eek)
* Not spend
* Go over CBT exercises (online)
* Install application so I can continue ECDL on lappie (till PC is fixed)
* Get PC fixed

That'll be enough to get on with anyway ...

LINK

Oh yeah, the wee yin's not well. He had a sore throat and head this morning but didn't push for a day off.

He spent 10 mins in the 'sickness room' at school and felt like crap when he came home.

*calpol*

*huggle*

Day off tomorrow.

Still gonna meet Jack for a coffee though

It's released today. Properly released I mean.

They're going for a record number of downloads. I just got it but dunno if it's great yet

I'll let you know ...

Last night, whilst closing the curtains, I broke Mini's pal's Xbox headset

Didn't sleep too well at first. Where can I get one cheap?

Anyway, found one fairly cheap. My guardian angel is gonna help me with it.

Thing is ... I was gonna buy one for the lad for his birthday

He lent his to another boy, who broke it then bought himself a new set!!

Pure cheek. So now I need to buy two. Except I'm gonna get the Messenger set for Mini (it's got a snap-on keyboard with it)

Whilst telling someone very cute about all of this earlier, I decided to take the lappie et all outside, as it's mildly sunny.

Dumped a side table with a load of stuff on the patio. Plonked the folding chair through the open window next to said table with loads of stuff on it ... smacked my famous tea cup onto the patio with my delicious, just at the right temperature (cold) earl grey tea in it, onto the concrete

What is it with me? Eh?

Broken PC again ... broken headset ... broken cup ... parasol I can't afford ... Fit Flops I can't afford ... trip to somewhere next weekend ... Mini's birthday in 19 days ... trip to somewhere else the week after that ... Galway in August.

My bank will break. Help me, rich millionaires who want to adopt 40 yr old women!

*slump*

Yes, I know I sound really sorry for myself. Don't take it that way, will ya? I whinge about it then let it drop outta my brain

I just like moaning

As you know, my PC has caked it again. Son's homework can't be printed out cos the lappie isn't attached blah blah blah

I stuck his homework on a USB stick, to take to school to print out.

He got a red card for not producing his homework, cos the PC needed the disc to install the USB thingy

It doesn't matter what you do ... they think you are lying!!!

Aching all week. That's the biggest problem with lots of walking/shopping.

My back, my hips, my feet *ouch*

I've been testing different ... shoes/sandals/with socks/without ... combinations and my feet are feckin shredded.

Nowhere to go tomorrow so I hope it's sunny. Parasol & lappie in the garden till the wee yin comes back. Trying to hide from alky neighbour who always wants to tap summat. I prefer not to talk to anyone my ex started talking to her originally, I seem to have inherited the contact

It's strange, being this anti-social. Does ignoring folk mean I could get an ASBO?

I guess it's just living in my wee haven. Too many thoughts, noisy head, close the door.

Managed to get father's day present sent. You shoulda seen the wrapping OMG

Bought summat for the wee yin to give ex. He knows I'll have bought it for him today. When the wee yin comes back I'll slip the gift to him and he'll present it to his dad He knows the sketch. Mibbe I'll text ...

"I've found the gift that Mini saved up 3 weeks pocket money for, then wrapped, hid and forgot about. He can give you it tomorrow when you drop him off"

Bluddy we'ans

Are you bored yet? There's feck all on telly

*drumming fingers*

A letter arrives.

I stopped work on 30th May, my income support needs re-assessing ...

From 27th May till 23rd June they will be paying me (lol) £6.66 per week.

*apt*

evil gits

Spent far too much this week. Thank heavens for overdrafts

Went out with P today. She had an app at the hospital then we went for a spot of mooching round town. I now have a present for my dad for Father's Day - two days too late cos I'll have to send it now and it'll be late. D'oh!

So last night I bought Fit Flops online

And today I bought myself a cheapo ring from Evans and stuck other stuff on my Debenhams card

Still have the lad's birthday and next weekend's jaunt to pay for *eek*

But ... my ex boss phoned today and asked me to do the returns for him next week! *chuffed*

Big boost to my self esteem.

Lots of things have been less than successful recently so that helped.

The boy has a wee small friend staying tonight and they're playing Xbox. I'm gonna have to kick them off soon cos the JR Show is on. If I can't have Peep Show I can at least have that!

Anything remotely personal will be a private post as of now. Mini told me his wee pal was looking over my shoulder earlier.

The wee man knows about boundaries and privacy, but his pal doesn't.

(yes I know it's a public blog, but you know what I mean!)

That's all.

L'il bit exhausted.

Many, many shops have been browsed and I've seen lots of things I cannot afford.

My PC went tits up during the week. Totally zapped everything. Used the recovery disc and the bugger reformatted *back to the PC shop* ££££££££££££££££

It can't see the other hard drive or the CD writer. I don't think I have the disc for the other hard drive *sigh*

MBT shoes look really cool and might help my back, but they're £145

Got a parasol though so my garden will be used this year.

Had an utterly delicious curry last night. Marks & Sparks spices and added stuff *slurp*

xxx

Another 'episode' from Mad Woman. Shouting outside that her daughter's blood is on my head. Shaking.

This is to document with the others.

Glad my dad will be here soon.

Probably won't be here much till next Thursday. Well maybe late at night.

I'll miss you.

The Rules:

Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5-6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they've been tagged.

1. What I was doing 10 years ago:
Looking after my 3 year old

2. What 5 things are on on my to-do list for today:
Clean my bedroom for dad and step-mum to sleep in
Buy some food
Wrap birthday presents
Delete links to blog from my favourites
Try to relax

3. Snacks I enjoy:
Doritos chilli flavour
Cheese n crackers

4. Things I would do if I was a billionaire:
Give summat to dad, step-mum, bro, aunt, Andy's family, ex, Lie Woman (yes that's right), and P.
And ... er ... I don't know !! It would involve Andy and I having several holidays and a few nice houses.

5. Places I have lived:
Paisley
Huntingdon
Cambridge

Tag - Hektor, GoingSomewhere, Xenon, JackFrost and Jake Taylor

Last warning for Mini.

One more cuss at a teacher and he's excluded for a week.

Twice more and he's oot the door

Telling him off becomes hypocrisy ... I was just like that.

Sorry, wee man, I do know how you feel.

P put some stuff into perspective for me yesterday, as I wasn't able to. She knows my worries about a certain trauma. I'm waiting to hear from someone but they will be limited in what they can say due to data protection.

---

The hotel/spa thing is down to P too. As I have an enormous event coming up, she is treating me to a weekend away. Tesco vouchers are involved (I'm all for a bargain) and it means more to me just for that fact. She planned it ages ago. What a good friend. It won't be far from here, less than an hour's drive for health reasons.

I'm in the middle of cleaning. Fortunately I'll be sleeping in the PC room so I don't have to clean that

Can't believe what a dreaded thing it's become. I should battle the brain blocks and overcome them but I really can't be arsed so they can win.

*more music maestro*

It's Strawberry Fair on Saturday. I'll not be going. I've been loads before and it'd be more fun if I was stoned. That won't be happening any time soon so *bleugh*

Dad here on Saturday. Free weekend next weekend then the following one I'll be off to stay at a hotel/spa type thingy for a couple of days. Swimming, shopping and eating

In July it's the lad's birthday, then there may be a tiny little dinner with some friends. I don't know the specifics yet.

Nice to have summat to break up the tundra

Dunno why but lately my mood has been completely trashed. It crept up on me a bit and battered the crap outta me today.

It seems to have slunk away tonight but I can't relax yet in case it comes back. I know how weird that sounds but *fneugh*

Not so much a wave but a flood of gloom.

I'm thinking it could be down to diet. Toast has been my regular for the past few days. I've had a few other things but 2 out of 3 meals have been toast based. Depression is a vicious circle. I thought I was getting over it too

No motivation for anything. So much for the cleaning. I've been sitting here immobilised all frickin day, willing myself to move and get it done *sigh*

I've been meaning to email a lovely friend since I got a text and I can't seem to get my head round it either.

*waves to lovely friend* I've not forgotten you *hug*

The boy's been in trouble at school so is grounded. That isn't worrying me too much.

I do so many things wrong. I think wrong.

Can't bring myself to interact at times. Posting, not answering comments. Sorry. It's not you, it's me

xXx

... and check out the 25th comment. Look familiar?

LINK

This doesn't look good

It feels illegal.

It took you bluddy ages to notice that tag then

Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses.
Margaret Millar

Strangely this really annoys me in Starbucks, for instance, but not in blog